Thursday, November 30, 2017

Seven Year Itch

We have now been living in the Dominican Republic for seven years. Well, the anniversary date is actually December 2 but close enough.

We have seven dogs. I hope this is only a coincidence because I refuse to continue to add to the pack.

What do I miss about living in Canada other than family? Not much but the following: Big Macs, Coffee Crisps, sunflower seeds, wine gums, the smell of fall, first snow fall, and a whole host of other things that I can’t think about right now. The coffee hasn’t completely kicked in yet.

I miss being able to go to one store and buy something knowing it will always be there.  For example, frozen peas.  Not rock hard pigeon peas, but sweet, green peas.  For anyone who knows me well, I do not eat soft green things but I will eat green peas.  In seven years, I have only found really good frozen peas twice.  Seriously.

Alberta Beef.

I also miss normal driving. Driving with rules of the road. I have always had road rage but driving here has taken it to a new level. Yes, there are traffic laws here but I always say they are “suggested” laws. Not many people actually follow the laws. Green lights do not necessarily mean it is safe to go through the light. One must always check and make sure no one is running the red. I now pass traffic on the right shoulder because that is acceptable here. A two lane highway can very easily be made into a four lane highway and no one really gives a rats ass about the possibility of a head on-collision because inevitably, someone will try and pass in this mayhem.


What don’t I miss? A few things come to mind but specifically shoveling snow.  Frozen boogers from shoveling said snow.

We drive an absolute piece of crap looking car. It used to be a good car but the last year has been interesting. We have had to replace the water pump, alternator, starter, and tires. Ross found this handy little hole in the wall place to get things fixed at a very reasonable rate. Love it when we go somewhere and upon return to the car, we have paint and body shop business cards stuck under the rusting windshield wipers. Ross is now demanding seat covers as the leather has now cracked and unless you are really careful getting in, you are going to need stitches for unauthorized surgery. You don’t want to have a fancy smanchy car here – cars are stupid expensive and you just never know what you are getting as most cars are imported with a host of hidden problems. And the nicer the car, the more likely it will look like a piece of crap from parking lots, four lane highways, livestock on the road, motos on the road and the sun.

Well, about a month ago, Thing 3 (Hailey) moved to live with us - she's having a gap year.  Gap from what?  We'll get that figured out. 

It has been interesting to be empty-nesters for seven years to suddenly having another being (or alien hormonal female) living in the house with us. Kind of like getting another dog except this one is completely house trained. Well, kind of. This one eats about eight times a day/night. This one likes to accumulate dirty dishes. This one has made me realize that floors aren’t just for dog hair. They are for clothing! I never knew that. I am still learning things at this stage of my life.

Thing 3 is starting to make friends. Well, mostly friends with my friends and that is perfectly ok. For anyone familiar with the lay of the land here, any young, attractive, white female is fair game for the local man population. Well, the man population can think whatever they want – this Mama Bear is on over protective drive! She has even had the garbage man’s crew of guys cat whistling and calling at her. We didn’t get our garbage picked up yesterday and I’m secretly wondering if it is because she wasn’t standing at the gate.

So seven year itch – the only thing itchy here are mosquito bites and seven dogs with dry skin.